An Actual Update For Once!

Let's get the complaining out of the way! I'm sick. So sick. The worst cold I've had all year possibly and that's saying something for someone who has a shot immune system. I don't think I've ever written about here, but when I was in the 4th grade, I got so sick that for some reason I was bleeding internally, there was so much blood that I had no choice but to throw it all up constantly for a few days (or you know, just sit back and try not to die while it literally oozed out of my mouth, whichever you prefer). They never quite figured out what caused it, but they knew it had something to do my head/neck/throat. So now whenever I get sick like this, I cough up my own damn blood. Not a lot, just enough to prove the point that I will be sick and uncomfortable for days. I'm not over-exaggerating either; my parents were told to expect the worst, make arrangements and have family come visit me. That, plus five years before having the worst case of pneumonia my hospital has ever seen, has left me with a pretty shit immune system. If you are sick: do not stand by me, breathe my air, look at me, or even think about me, because I will catch your God forsaken cold. I've already run out my cough drops once (and now have two glorious bags full; each with 33% more!), I've had more than 25 cups of hot green tea with honey, I've taken my dayquil, asked my mom to grab me some theraflu, have my vicks' vaporinhaler (which is to be treasured for the gem it truly is), and my box of handy dandy tissues. Also, I took some vitamins, but that's my usual song and dance routine. All in all, I'm not too pleased with my body to pick this particular month to get a stupid cold.

Anyway, on to other things:

• I saw my dad for the first time in almost a year. I won't really go too much into it; it's private and I'm not sure if people are still keeping their sick little tabs on me for fun! So, it was nice, awkward, emotional, etc. Basically all of the things you'd expect it to be after such a long time and so much drama surrounding our relationship (aside from the divorce, and then with the divorce on top of it).
  
• We will be holding a candle light vigil on  the 23rd (at his Honor's flag), marking the one year anniversary of Ronnie's death. If you're in the area and would like to pay tribute to his life, his sacrifice, and his remarkable family, it starts at 6pm. Taps will be played in his honor (which Lord knows, won't be an easy one to get through) and there will as always, be the strong sense of community and love most have come to associate with our Hero. If you don't know where his Honor's flag is and would like to attend, please send me an email/comment/text and I'll let you know!
  
• We'll also be celebrating his 21st birthday on the 28th! Brenda has gone through so much trouble to make sure that will all be together to remember her son, and I couldn't be more thankful for her strong heart. I know Ronnie would be so proud of his mother. She has done so much for all us in the last year and has been such an incredible beacon of strength for us-- all of her surrogate children and her own family! She has also been a beacon of light for other Gold Star families/friends/communities, as she is now a member of the Patriot Guard Riders (who were such an enormous blessing last year to us all). I'm not sure how long I plan to be there; it's honestly so hard to think about, but I will be there to give hugs and take a shot for my brother.
  
• Keeping with the military theme apparently: an old friend from high school is taking a couple days of leave for a family event and is coming out to visit! I'm not sure if I can express how excited I am for this. I didn't get to see Ronnie before he went back to Afghanistan; I was working every day and night in another city, while he and his girlfriend had gotten back together. We were both so busy and honestly thought we'd have time his next leave, it breaks my heart that I didn't get to see him and it honestly haunts me. This friend and I were never particularly close in high school, though I did enjoy talking with him when I wasn't severely intimidated by the fact that he was a Senior, when I had just started high school! But this last year we've grown closer and I still enjoying talking to him, so I'll be happy to see him while he's here. It'll be a nice change of pace, to be honest.

I think that's all the news I have right now. Nothing terribly exciting from an outsider's point of view, I suppose. But this next two weeks mean the world to me and I hope that when the time comes, I'll be able to give my 110% as we celebrate the incredible life Ronnie led-- he deserves no less than everyone's very best. So prayers and positive vibes for health and healing would be great appreciated!

xx